Kyley Hedges' "Big Brother in Vegas, 2005" Indiana State University

Doug Martin's Class Material Has Walked Over to

http://snowvigating.blogspot.com

New Year's Reading Draws Breaking Crowds

Skeeter Boatman backstage


New Year's night climaxed in an unprecedented turnout of 563 people in the Universal, Indiana townhall. Reading from his new collection entitled Mushroom Sonnets Shakespeare Forgot, town poet Skeeter Boatman (known around the Midwest for his circus juggling of traditional forms) wooed the audience for over six and a half hours. In fact, roads in and out of the metropolis were closed down during the event, due to drunk drivers and massive congestion. After the stellar reading, Boatman--dressed in a suit designed by New Yorker Ali Sandstone--signed autographs and passed out free bowls of lettuce to the VIPs.

If you haven't discovered his brilliant work, order Skeeter's new collection from Stand-Up Comedy for Dogs in Paris, or through Amazon.com and hip bookstores near you.

Our Two Daughters, My How They've Grown!

Doug Martin en Oficina

Unpublished Letter to the Daily Clintonian, Date Unknown

Dear Editor:

Walt Whitman, the poet, once said: "I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained." Unfortunately, some citizens in Clinton, Indiana do not feel the same. The story in June 23rd’s Daily Clintonian ("Deer wanders into city, and has to be destroyed by police") is appalling. Was the deer out to kidnap children? Was the deer out to splash mud over governmental officials? I think not.

I eat meat and am not a PETA screamer. I do, however, believe that someone should have called a moment of spiritual silence when supposedly the deer was seen outside of the baseball diamonds at Sportland Park during a game (at least the deer was not in the grandstands knocking over toddlers to retrieve a foul ball).

Why the DNR officers were "out of the area," or "out in left field" remains a mystery, but if people were so upset with the deer’s existence, the police should have tranquillized and carried it back into the woods, where, of course, eventually someone else would have shot it.

Frankly, I’ve seen worse things in Clinton, Indiana. A few deer might make the city a better place. In his poem "Annual Report," James Tate best sums it up: "And there were five Deer Complaints (Well pardon us for existing.)."

Sincerely,

Doug Martin
Universal, Indiana

A Fax for Susan Neville Circa 2004 with Slight Textual Emendations

To: Heidi Buchanan, ISU Bookstore
From Dr. Doug Martin, [ISU] English Department

Dear Heidi Buchanan:

I phoned you a few days ago concerning the bookstore ordering books for an upcoming reading by Susan Neville sponsored by the English Department’s Creative Writing Program and the Friends of the Cunningham Memorial Library. The reading will take place in the browsing room of the library on Wednesday April, 27th at 3:30p.m.

You told me it was no problem to order a few copies of Susan Neville’s books for the reading, and that I should fax you the necessary information on the specific books she has published.

Thus, here is the following information:

BOOKS BY SUSAN NEVILLE

1. Title: The Invention of Flight: Stories
(Flannery O’Connor Award for Short Fiction)*
Press: Univ. of Georgia Press
Date of Publication: May 1st, 1984
ISBN: 0820307068

2. Title: Indiana Winter
Press: Indiana University Press
Date of Publication: August 1st, 1994
ISBN: 0253208793

3. In the House of Blue Lights
(Richard Sullivan Prize in Short Fiction)
Press: University of Notre Dame Press
Date of Publication: May 1st, 1998
ISBN: 0268011842

4. Title: Twilight in Arcadia: Tobacco Farming in Indiana
Press: Indiana Historical Society
Date of Publication: May 1st 2000
ISBN: 0871951444

5. Title: Fabrication:
Essays on Making Things and Making Meaning
Press: Macadam/Cage Publishing
Date of Publication: February 1, 2001
ISBN: 1878448080

6. Title: Iconography: A Writer’s Meditation
Press: Indiana Univ. Press
Date of Publication: August 1st, 2003
ISBN: 0253216141

Thank you so much for your help and time. If there is anything you need to ask concerning this list of books, please contact me.

Sincerely,


Doug Martin
Office Phone: Ex. 3153
**Email: dougmartin832@yahoo.com

* Textual Note: This line in the original text appears on the same space as the previous line. Due to marginal changes in this fasimile, it was essential for the editors to make this slight textual modification.

**The author of this letter originally had placed his home phone number in a line between the "Office Phone" and "Email" entries. After careful consideration and hours of committee meetings, we have decided to delete the original personal phone number for reasons solely of security.

Recipe for Canadian Francis Bacon

This is an old recipe originating with Juliet Childs (is that her name?) first presented at the Breadloaf Writers' Conference when the famous chef was a scholar and passed down from generation to generation of writers and the curious.

Tools

1. 1 Budson burner
2. 1 skillet
3. 1 palmreacher for tossing

The Scoop

Let leap 6 slices of Canadian Francis Bacon into clean skillet; add 2 couplets of butter (preferrably rhymed); intellectualize in a dash of Derrida; let simmer until crispy. After cooling, dip slices in antique Pepper Martin baseball helmet filled with powdered sugar and snow.

Amendments

* Serves best under purple neon lights, monk chantings in surround-sound, and with lemon.

* Serves Brian Evenson and 3 Rhode Island snowmonkeys.

French blizzard

Ma femme aux aisselles de martre et de fenes

Andre Breton

snowlinks

elimae

ISU Student Creative Writing Association

Oklahoma Music Guide

webdelsol.com

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